The highest level of community is, what we’ll label, the Citizen Layer (CL). The CL is the largest level or layer of community and provides one unique experience: it allows its participants to be part of something much larger than themselves. This layer is labeled the CL because of how it relates to citizenship in a country: citizens of a country share little in common except the values represented by the country. So for example, American citizens share the value of freedom, even though most Americans don’t know many of the other 350,000,000 other citizens of the country. Yet, their lack of personal knowledge of one another wouldn’t prevent two strangers from discussing the value. Or for example, the CL layer is a kin to showing up a Yankee baseball game at Yankee Stadium or any other sporting event, or a concert in Madison Square Garden. While 55,000 people may be sitting in the stands, most, if not all the attendees are there for one reason: to cheer their team on or to watch their favorite band perform. Most people in the stadium or concert hall at the time of the game or concert don’t know any other fans, except for maybe the friends they came with. But for the tens of thousands of people that journeyed to the event, they’re all there to see and cheer for their team or band. The large event makes the community experience and all that attend share in that experience.

The next level or layer of community is the Neighborly Layer (NL). The NL is the middle layer. It functions as a mezzanine level between the CL and the next layer that will be discussed. The NL allows its participants to be part another unique experience: to be seen and valued. Everyone has neighbors, whether you live in a densely populated global city, the suburbs, or the rural parts of the world. The difference is proximity. By way of example, I live in a densely populated housing complex with 1800 apartments. On my floor there are eight apartment units. One of my neighbors is Mr. Schwartz. Mr. Schwartz is a 92 year-old retired Orthodox rabbi who lives with his wife. When my family is preparing to go on vacation, I can knock on Mr. Schwartz’s door and ask if he wouldn’t mind collecting my NY Times newspapers while my family is away. Or I can run across the hall and borrow a cup of sugar. Or, as has happened on several occasions, Mr. Schwartz has invited me over on a very warm Saturday morning. He then has asked me if the apartment temperature was too my liking. I responded that it was exceptionally warm. So he then gave me permission to make myself comfortable, which I did, by turning on his air-conditioner. In other words, I became his shabbat goy! We always exchange niceties; we always ask how are families are doing; we sometimes exchange small gifts; but we have no idea about the ins-and-outs of each other’s lives. Again, we see and value one another. Most people can be neighborly up to 60 people; we can know their names, know a little about their lives, what they do for a living, and maybe even a celebration and a hardship. But we can really never know the deepest recesses of their hearts

The final and smallest layer of community is the Family Layer (FL). The FL sandwiches the NL with the CL. (See Diagram 1.) The FL allows its participants another unique experience: to be known and cared for. The intimacies that can take place at the FL cannot take place at the NL and certainly not at the CL. Its name says it all, since the most intimate family units are approximately 6 to 12 people strong. Similar to how tightknit family functions, the FL provides the safe and intimate space for someone to share their deepest thoughts. The FL can grow up to 12 or so people. Any larger and it begins to impinge upon the NL, which is can range from 20 to 60. People who are engaged at this level of community life can begin to experience deep, rich and thick relationships. Much like an ideal family, the FL provides the level of intimacy where fears, joys, frustrations, and other human emotions and thoughts can be shared and empathized with. In other words, people only tend to share their deepest confidences with family members or extremely close friends. This is what makes the FL unique.

This may come as a surprise, but all three layers of community need to be active in the life of every congregation no matter its size. In other words, all congregations must have a level of community that provides each experience: “I’m part of something larger than myself;” a level that says, “I’m seen and valued;” and a level that says, “I’m known and cared for.” So what, in most churches, constitutes these three layers? NB: When thinking through the three layers of community, it is always important to think about the future of your congregation—what it is becoming, rather than what it is currently. When a layer of community is misidentified or misrepresented and a concept belonging to another layer is inserted wrongly inserted into a layer, it is difficult to undo that error in the future with your congregants. They will feel that The Sunday Worship Experience The CL or the highest layer of community life in a congregation is the Sunday worship experience. No matter the size of the congregation, the usual “big event” is Sunday morning around 11:00am. Even if your congregation is only 60 people strong on a Sunday morning, it should be considered the CL. The person who attends the Sunday worship experience can say, “I’m part of something larger than myself,” and “I believe the things these other people believe” or at least “I want to believe the things these other people believe.” Midsize Groups, Mezzanines and Other Forums Gathering 20 or more people together for midsize events can establish the NL or middle layer of community life in a congregation. This can happen during a coffee hour after the Sunday worship experience; it can happen at an adult forum; it can also happen as a result of volunteers showing up on a given day to distribute food at a food pantry. The person who attends one of these events will be “seen and valued” for what they contribute to the midsize group. Small Groups, Prayer Circles and Other Intimate Encounters Whether your congregation has a small group Bible study ministry or knitting circles, these more intimate settings of less than 12 people provide the FL of community where your congregants can be “known and cared for.” They are the safe spaces where people can share their joys, sorrows, hopes and disappointments. They also provide the space for a few-on-one pastoral ministry to take place (see BCP, 855, Catechism answer to, “Who are the ministers of the Church?).

As mentioned in the Introduction, all three layers of community need to be active in your congregation for community life to function well. It has been my experience that churches—especially smaller ones—have had the tendency to either conflate the layers or eliminate one altogether. Here are some of the challenges that arise from doing either. Conflating the Three Layers of Community When a congregation conflates one layer of community with another challenges arise. Here’s one example: A small church of about 60 people in attendance on Sunday that has been in decline for several years has decided to brand itself as a “small family church.” First, core families are not 60 people in size. The challenge is that people cannot know and care for 59 other people. So the Sunday worship event is not the place to provide intimacy. Why? Because the Sunday worship experience is not the environment for intimate relationships to develop. Congregants may have difficulty remembering all the names of the 60 or so congregants. It is also important to remember that the future plays a vital role in community development. I once worked with a small congregation that decided to impose nametags on all the people who walked through the doors on Sunday to worship. While nametags are not a bad thing in themselves, the worship experience is not the proper place for them, since the worship experience provides the space to be “part of something larger than yourself. Moreover, if a hurting or confused person who has never attended your service decided to walk through the doors on a Sunday to process their hurt or confusion, and sit alone in the rear pews to do so, asking that person to wear a nametag may contribute to never seeing that person again. The nametag request may be too much, too soon. A better place for the use of nametags would have been the coffee hour following the service. That environment provides the space for people to be “seen and valued.” While a small congregation of 40 or so people can “see and value” one another and utilize nametags to do so, if and when that congregation grows to 250, and if at that time the nametag idea is finally suspended, the people who once “liked” the nametag idea will soon feel shortchanged. Abrogating a Layer of Community What happens when one or more of the essential three layers of community are eliminated? The layer or layers that remain are forced to pick up the slack of the missing layer(s). Thus, eliminating a layer of community has the unfortunate result of conflation.